Charlotte's Web

Blogging my world since 2006

Setting the Record Straight


I owe my husband an apology. What I blithely defined as the “man-flu” was really the Big and Nasty Flu. And I should know, because now I’ve got it. Frankly, I’ve had it with illness, mine or anyone else’s, and would like some health to come flooding our way this month.

Let the record show that:

  • Before Christmas, Daisy had a bout of flu that relocated to her hip so that she couldn’t walk. Quaintly known as Hueftschnuepfen (hipsniffles), this meant no kindergarten for some days and a visit to hospital for X-rays and scans to ensure that she didn’t have arthritis. She didn’t.
  • After Christmas, just as kindergarten was starting again, Daisy contracted the quaintly named Gurtelrosen (shingles) which made her infectious to anyone who had not had chickenpox. Ollie was immediately innoculated and neither he nor Daisy could hang out with any other kids, except Lily.
  • Just as we got Daisy back to kindergarten, Thomas came down with the Big and Nasty Flu, which Daisy also contracted, so she stopped going to kindergarten.
  • I had a one-night stand with BNF, except mine was in the form of severe vomiting.
  • Ollie caught the gastro from me, and had to be rushed to hospital, where he spent four days recovering with a drip in his head.
  • Three days ago, on Ollie’s return from hospital, I got the BNF in its full form and have been laid flat since then. This is the first time I have been able to look at a screen without the lights hurting my head, and that’s probably because I’m nursing a hot toddy laced with A LOT of whisky.

Here are some good things:

  • Everyone, except me, seems to be on the mend.
  • The sun shone today and the children went out for a bike ride.
  • Lily has only missed one day of school since starting in September, so I think she’s rounded the corner from being a little kid who catches every bug to a tougher big kid.
  • It’s the weekend, so I can actually lie in bed and groan while Thomas feeds and entertains the small people.
  • Our wonderful friends have helped us with grocery shopping, taking the non-sick children for play-dates and ferrying them to their afterschool activities. Thanks and you know who are!
  • Daisy missing kindergarten means she’s missed out on the headlice epidemic, which given her full and bounteous head of hair, is a great relief.

Here’s what I’m hoping for:

  • A return to our normal routine on Monday
  • Rude health for all

And now I’m going to make myself a fresh toddy and head for my bed. Night night.

Author: charlotteotter

Novelist, feminist, crime writer

19 thoughts on “Setting the Record Straight

  1. I had the vomiting flu in November. Horrid, horrid, horrid. Especially if you’re a man. Hope Monday is indeed normal, rude and healthful 🙂

  2. We all had the BNF over Christmas at the grandparents’ house, which worked well considering they were instant babysitters while we laid about groaning.

    Hope you get lots of rest this weekend and no-one has more than a mild case of schnuepfen for the rest of the school year!

  3. That sounds awful. Drink more toddies!!

  4. What an exhausting time for all of you – hopefully you’ve got all your allotted illnesses over and done with for the rest of the year!

  5. Oww. Gurtelrosen. Ow. Sorry. Just empathising with Daisy (and having a scratch at a case of phantom gurtelrosen).

    Good to hear that everyone is on the mend. You won’t be far behind them but until then — keep up the consumption of toddies and take care of yourself (oh, you know I mean let yourself be taken care of…)

  6. I wish you the rudest health of all and as soon as possible.

    Ooh, the BNF. If it’s any consolation, ten years ago I had the BNF, the vomitting kind, the not being able to move kind. I was so weak for ages afterwards, I was like a character from 1930s novel. But since then I have not had even a whiff of the BNF. That nasty bout appeared to inoculate me against it.

    So I hope this nasty flu packs its bags soon and does not return!

  7. Oh, gawd gal, you definitely have to think of flying in a grandmother or two or a deeply concerned aunt and give yourself a bit of recovery time.

    Here are my wishes that your recovery is quick and that the pampering from your husband and friends continues long after it the crisis is over.

  8. I wish you all well as fast as possible. Mom’s never really get to be ill, they always have to deal with everyone else. Tomorrow is Sunday, just have a really peaceful day, keep warm, drink toddies, read something light and undemanding; on Monday you will be the better for it.

  9. I have never had the BNF. I now thank my lucky stars that it has passed me by, probably owing to my rude health and constant hand washing.

    During the recent ice storm the BNF showed up at the shelter at the Civic Center and I don’t even want to think about what that must have been like: sheltering from teh cold and having no power and being sick. quarantined from the rest of the people in the Exhibition Hall upstairs outside the theater entrance where there were toilets, sleeping on cots.

    Hope you get better QUICK!.

  10. Oh, I hope it’s not the kind of bug that can travel online and spread through computers to other bloggers! Wish you a prompt recovery and as many toddies as you want!

  11. Thanks for all the well wishes everyone. Sunday’s looking to be a much better day than Saturday, Friday or Thursday were. Onward to rude health!

  12. Oh, that sounds…just awful. Thank god for toddies – I think they are the only thing that help me (I’m allergic to a compound that goes into most medicines – soy lecithin) – at any rate, take good care of yourself, now, and here’s hoping the rest of the month will find your family strong and healthy.

  13. Wow! Hope you feel better soon! Rude health is a wonderful thing :0

  14. It sounds awful! Hope you recover entirely soon, and that you all manage to duck away from any more passing germs…

  15. I remember just how awful this part of winter used to be when my son was little and we’d pick up viruses and pass them around between us. Mind you I don’t think we ever had anything as horrid as you’ve all been contracting. Look at it this way: you must all have super-boosted immune systems now, and spring can’t be far off…. Take GOOD care of yourself and pump in the vitamins.

  16. Yuk! Hope all is calm and you are all full of health – or nearly – now.

  17. Apology accepted, though not required.

  18. My version of this particular phenomenon was a lost voice (for 5 days) and a racking cough for many weeks.

    I do like hipsniffles. So descriptive. That’s what I love about the German language.

  19. So nice that you included the “good things” too. That’s sure to help you onto a speedy recovery.

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